03 July 2006


How frustrated can one get till one decides to give up on love? Is the degree and intensity of giving up on love even directly proportional to the degree or intensity of hoping to find love?

Meet test subject number one (TS1) : Goodlooking, intelligent, fun to be with, stable and hardworking professional and in his early twenties... He doesn't even know it yet, but most above average people would simply go gaga over TS1 (and by above average looking I mean those who are as equally good looking, sucessful, etc. etc...almost perfect individuals in their almost perfect perfect universes). TS1 feels he cant hold on to love, not even find the "right kind of love". So now, he chooses not to love, chooses to close on doors to love. Fact is, he only started to become a willing participant in the game only recently and considering how limited the opportunities there are for men in my age bracket, I'd stay he's got more than seven or eight years advantage over us --- advantage to make mistakes, to fall in and out of love, to grow, to learn, to teach..... Still, TS1 gave up on love. Was it the ex? the could have beens? or my loud mouth telling him that his motto should be "mamamatay silang hindi ka nila natitikman"? (Good one Red, for that you win a prize)

Test subject number two (TS2): is a bombshell in her own right, with the right curves and protruding body parts in their correct and acceptable measurements; funny, witty, you get the picture. TS2 has seen how people would lay her down like a doormat and walk over her, has seen how many men would tear her heart and give it back to her in bits and pieces - how she'd try to glue them back on all together hoping that she'd make herself whole again and available for the next person who'd enter her life and fall in love with her... then the cycle starts all over again.... A litle heartbreak here, a state of autism there and whooppeeethe lady is ready to fall again. While she may constantly be ranting about how old she is, how her skin sags here and there (or how she prays she'd win the lotto to get a nip here, a tuck there..yadadadadada), still here she is, always back on track and loves the game....

Considering the foregoing, is it safe to conclude that the intensity of giving up on love or hoping to fall in love is...

a) not dependent on age
b) not dependent on past or present experiences
c) a choice, not merely a product of a collection of experiences in consideration of item A
d) is inveresely proportional with each other

Hmmm.... why do I even bother......