01 February 2010

The Train Ride That was Meant to Last 99 Years

Copyright Ritche F. Baria, February 02, 2010

From that day I saw an old couple, probably in their 60's, sharing trains with each other like as if it were their first, I've always hoped that I will share more train rides with you for the rest of our lives. And you said you would... From that moment on... I knew I will always look forward to that.

But here I am alone... looking past each building, each car, each post, every tree in sight, every glimpse of yellow sun that reminds me something is missing... it was you....

I keep on retracing each and every of our steps - every restaurant, every coffee shop, every cinema, every shop, everything that reminds me of a future that never will be. I guess I will be doing this for a while, maybe not to torture myself, but to remind myself not ever to allow my heart to get control of me.

Next stop, Ayala Station....

I remember this escalator, the very same escalator where you met me when you were shopping for your Halloween trimmings. I could recall each faint hello and giggle that went with it, and how surprised you were when I told you I was in Ayala. You were hungry then, but I said.. I'll take care of it... and I love taking care of you.

There goes that Max's restaurant where we made up after that night I walked out. Well, we almost didn't make up, but thanks to that couple who, in their eccentric minds started taking pictures, and made us laugh. You were meeting your friends then to attend Paulo's mom's birthday party. And on that night, you so proud to tell Tricia I was important... I guess I was... maybe...

Do you remember this activity area where we usually check out gadgets? You'll love what's on display. Being the photography fanatic that you are, you will droll over the lenses on display... but then again.. you are not here.

There's Food Choices.... remember how we just sit there over ice cream if we were too lazy to eat or think about eating... I could still see us seated and laughing about how other people would stare at us... yeah.. good times.

Who could forget the cinemas? You or me patiently waiting at Wendy's where we'd get food there or at Taters? The fries that you love, the fillets that I have been accustomed to eating.... the endless checking of merchandise at Rustan's while waiting for the screening.. (well you finally did get that bag you wanted)... and how you were irated by that attendant who made comments on you... yeah.. you always had it in you...

Now going to Greenbelt -- Topman, Topshop, Gola,name all the brands and we've been there... the late afternoon mass at Greenbelt which we couldnt finish either because of the heat or because we were impatient. And.... that's the bench where we argued and I walked out.... Sigh...I could explain to you again a hundred times that I did come back for you, but you weren't there.

Raging Storm.. Hahahaha! We showed them didn't we? We finished the entire game. Now no one's playing... No one seems to bother... No one seems to care touching those makeshift armalites.

Who could forget Centro? We were so pleased with that waitress that we decided to leave her a note written on tissues. But the waitresses/waiters there have been warm to us... maybe they were amused or glad.. I don't know anymore....

Recipes has been a new favorite. I told you that you will like Gising-gising.. and you did. I'm just glad now that at least, I was able to convince you to eat your veggies, now I know you will always be healthy...

Banana Leaf!!!!!! From that time we went to Cebu, we have always loved lamb curry. I remember standing in line outside that same door when I bought some for you when you stayed late for work. Like I said.. I do love taking good care of you....

Conti's! =) Pity they don't have that Mango Cream cake you love.. It's a good thing I was able to get you one whole cake before they phased it out... I wish I could find one for you again... Maybe not...

Greenbelt 1, Greenbelt 5 all restos and shops.... these all remind me of you... It gets harder and harder going around knowing that wherever I go, these all remind me of you. But this is the only way I can feel connected to you.

And Starbucks....the last place we ever saw each other, probably for the last time....I remember how controlled I was talking to you, you were as controlled as ever, and just that we didn't meet halfway. I never imagined that it will end that way... or this way.....

I keep on retracing the same steps till I get on that same train again....

Shangri-La? Where you bought my cake? Where you bought bibingka for your mom?

Megamall? Where you got me cookies and water when I was impatiently waiting for my turn at Smart?

Or should I go to The Block or Trinoma where everything began....? Asparagus wrapped in bacon for dinner? Movie starring Clive Owen "The International"? Coffee at Starbucks? Each and every memory playing in an endless loop...

The way I see it... my entire world revolved around you.. until the next 99 years...

I will keep on taking these trains, retracing these steps until finally one day, I will learn to give up..... maybe I won't.... But until that day.. these trains will still go on travelling their routes --- back and forth.... and who knows..... maybe when the time is right.... maybe we can share one train ride again.....

Maybe..... but I'm not counting on it anymore.......

2 comments:

  1. Comment by: lafouge
    Posted on: 02-04-2010 @ 09:08 am

    @Lighthouse Thanks, I know someone will eventually find me.


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    Comment by: lighthouse_23m
    Posted on: 02-03-2010 @ 09:29 pm

    Don't worry, someone better will come...


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    Comment by: lafouge
    Posted on: 02-02-2010 @ 04:43 pm

    I'd like to think that love is eternal... that no matter what, it can endure assuming that the other person wishes to endure. But the moment that the person gives up, then that's the time that the intensity of love lessens. That being the case, it doesn't mean that love dies per se, it's just that it's just there no matter how minimal the intensity is

    ReplyDelete
  2. Earl Fortuna ‎@cuz: breathe still though its the same air you share yet its not the same composition of air you intake.
    January 31, 2010 at 12:13pm · Like


    Ritche Baria ‎@Cuz: Yup less pollutants =)
    January 31, 2010 at 6:27pm · Like


    Bob Sy Friend, you know what to do...
    January 31, 2010 at 11:57pm · Like


    Ritche Baria ‎@Bob: I think I'll just keep my mouth shut this time :-)
    February 1, 2010 at 5:52am · Like


    Bob Sy Yup! I very much agree! :-)
    February 1, 2010 at 12:32pm · Like


    Ritche Baria ‎@Bob: Thanks for everything.
    February 1, 2010 at 12:57pm · Like


    Carlo Luis Ganzon awww nakakaiyak namn
    February 1, 2010 at 7:38pm · Like


    Ritche Baria ‎@Luis: di naman. It's just self preservation.
    February 1, 2010 at 8:54pm via · Like


    Fides Delos Santos sigh ... =(
    February 4, 2010 at 2:15pm ·

    ReplyDelete

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